In this week's episode, Nthenya and Yang get into Nthenya's immigration story, the journey to America and what she thought it would be like. It's a very different version of 'Coming to America.'
https://www.instagram.com/thecaucacityshow/
https://www.instagram.com/im_nthenya/
https://www.instagram.com/yangilenea/
It's Gemini season, you've got 10 minutes and then Caucasians people are outside like truly and really have you did you have a Caucasians moment this week? I had I think I was telling you that I'm living a Caucasian life right now because I'm unemployed and kind of doing that thing that most L.A. people do where they're like, have a weird side job that couldn't support them. So you're like, What? How do you live in L.A.? Yeah. And then you're like, I work at a cafe. I'm like, Well, how do you pay your rent? And like, I host at a café and you're like, That's not going to pay your rent. Tell me how you live in Los Angeles. And you guys want to know the secret you need help. You take somebody else's money, you get it subsidized, and that's how you survive in the city.
And it took me forever. And I used to like, really badger people about it. So now she's a well-kept woman. You see that massive regular finger? She could knock somebody out with it only if they knew the truth. But it's okay. Let's keep it. Keep up. Appearances. Wrong hand. Yeah. I mean, no, I love it. I agree. It is is very difficult.
It's certainly much easier. You need a roommate whether you're fucking them or not. Okay. This is very chic. And you need a roommate. Whether your You need a roommate? Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Shabo inking Shabo inking is good. We call it boom boom. It's sexy, right? That's what you and Michael tell each other. No wonder I told it to Alexis once where we were telling it, because, you know, we're also we were talking about this when we talk about, like, sex or something, we're not explicit.
Right? It's not because we're not adults and mature about it. It's just that I don't like it when people are too explicit about their sex life. So I'd be like, okay, so look, the other day we're about to boom boom, you know, like, so I don't like talk about the details of it, you know, like just let me get out of the way so I can tell this story, which I don't know if that's Caucasians of me or not, but we're about to boom.
Well, this is not me talking to Michael. This is like a meet talk about. Yeah, our personal lives that he wouldn't want. Yeah, Yeah, I got the boom. I know. It's a Sheboygan. Sheboygan is. I was just trying to make a word for that was going to be PG for boom boom. Okay. Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom is. I don't know. I was trying to make a word so that we could put this on the Internet without leaving it out. Gotcha. Gotcha. What's your most Caucasians Moment of the week of the month of the week? I'm trying to leave. We spend a lot of time together, so maybe I can also go in the Rolodex.
And what did I do this week? Doo doo doo doo doo doo doo. We're going to the center thinking I might. I mean, I probably have been, I think. I think that you're interacting with Comcast, like, with capacity. yeah, You're. You're like a full blown and very Caucasians experience. You're being an anthropologist right now. Yeah.
And they are proving me right. Yeah. You know, you're with hypothesis. Like, it's honestly and truly, and I'm probably going to get slack for this. Somebody is going to come for me. But whatever I was in this acting class at one point and the teacher was a white woman and she asked me what my biggest fear was.
And I said, White women. So she asked me. And so I told her the truth and the truth, and she burst into tears. burst into tears because this was circa, you know. So post 20, 20. Post 2020. Got you. Was like George Floyd, like, like allyship and all this stuff. And I was like, Yeah, you know, y'all be flip flopping.
And I just I don't I can't trust it. I don't know. I want to trust it. And I wasn't saying it like, white women bitches. Yeah, hate your fuck. Yeah. Hope you die tomorrow. Like it wasn't like. Crazy like that. I was just. You're like I did. Yes. Like, you know, honestly, my biggest fear is white women, because, like, yeah, I don't I don't know.
I don't like countless like the election with Donald Trump. Like, you just see the numbers and you're like, I supposedly know these women. Right. And they say stuff to my face, but then they vote against my interests in their own, and living in the South and South Carolina, like they were a group of friends of ours that we found out that they all voted for Trump.And this is also like while my friend was dying. So it was kind of just like, Wow, what a slap in the face. But at the same time. A Not unexpected didn't it didn't throw me. It just was like, there it is, right? It it is a new it. And I hate to say I knew it. Yeah. First part is like, man, I was really hoping that this wasn't going to be the outcome.
But this is a situation and I can't trust you can't trust you. And I wanted to and I entered this relationship wanting to trust you, but I can't. And that has been a recent discovery as well. Like with another white woman, it's like, okay, you flip flop like you say this, and then you turn around and you do the exact opposite where you say you're an advocate for x, Y, and Z.
You know, for people of color, people on the spectrum, people you know, the queer community. And then you actively do the opposite. Yeah, just don't do anything, which is, you know, indifference and indifference. I don't the quote by Martin Luther King Jr but somebody does. Yeah. Look it up and look it up. If you're indifferent, you might as well just be on the other side.
Yeah. And I'm also kind of like if you are, nobody asked you to be a hero. Nobody asked. Nobody asked. Please. I got to like, Yeah, I, I have opinions and thoughts and I want the world to be different. But sometimes I kind of like, I can't, I, I might. I'm. Am I going to lead the charge? No. But do you know who's. Who's always, like, ready, willing to be like, I'll lead white women? Yeah. And I'm like, what you guys like? You could just take a step back because some of us are not capable, and that's okay. That's okay. But I think the capacity and the capabilities of said people, I'm kind of just like I think it's like they have the resources and I think that if they if they did the things with the intentionality and with the respect for minorities and the other people that are involved in the movement, sure, they could mobilize.
They they should be the ones leading the charge because they're the ones that are going to get the least slack. They're the ones that are going to be affected the least professionally, you know, in their communities. You know, they're not going to be targeted by the police, they're not going to be Right. Fired from their jobs for speaking out.
Yeah. So yes, theoretically, absolutely. They should be leading the charge. However it's the sliding back. Right. It's the not, it's, it's the compromising of, of rights and opportunities for others that they're so willing to make on behalf of a goal that is problematic. And now, is that so serious? It's supposed to be funny. but that's okay. Sometimes it's just the real stuff and it's the real stuff.
00:08:56:02 - 00:09:23:10
Unknown
Yeah. And that's one of my that's my big issue. And I think that's what's frustrating because we go in and out of like being like, I want to burn it all to the ground, I want to bring it. And then, you know, we're just like, how about we just all just but then we're just like, like the amount of brain space it takes in our head to just constantly be worried about how we're contributing to the system or how we're not doing enough.
00:09:23:10 - 00:09:44:03
Unknown
Or are we like, you know, stay accountable to the things that we've said maybe we like. Then I always but then that's the thing that I'm kind of like, okay, well, why don't you guys all why aren't you all troubled in the middle of the night? You know, like seeing each other? we should throw our phones away.
00:09:44:03 - 00:10:12:15
Unknown
Yeah. Or just, like, why isn't it as loud? And I'm just like, it's just not as loud to them. It's not going to be as loud as loud. It's not going to. It's not, you know, they're more worried about that ex that they shouldn't have textured years ago. You know it's just it's it's fine. That's why it just that's what's also hard about it is sometimes when I talk to people sorry white people about their problems and one of the times it's just like they're like, I'm just really upset about my career or like this guy.
00:10:12:15 - 00:10:30:25
Unknown
He said that he liked me and he didn't text me back and I was like, People are currently dying and not to be that person, to be like, They're starving children all around the world. But I'm more just like, I don't like to flippantly complain about those things because I just know I'm like, and I know you're like, Well, you should just in comparison, you shouldn't live in comparison did it.
00:10:30:27 - 00:10:55:20
Unknown
But I'm also like, these are all all of these things of this thing of people telling me to validate my own issue only like it's coming from a white person. So I don't know. It's just it's nice sometimes when they're just going to like, I don't bother myself with those thoughts, you know, I just have so much going on in my actual life to even consider what's going on in the world, which sometimes I like that.
00:10:55:20 - 00:11:19:04
Unknown
I'm like, Sure, you know what? I do want to take a break. Go ahead, Cheryl. Tell me about your life. But yeah, I don't think I've ever uttered those words. What? Cheryl, tell me. I'm always just like, I want to tap out. Yeah, I'm tap out of World War eight. I like it. I like. I like to tap tap out and be like, That is messy.
00:11:19:10 - 00:11:44:03
Unknown
How many times did you sleep with That is crazy. Keep going. Well, I guess it's kind of like it can't be found here. I feel like a lot of times I was talking about this one person in particular that always has really like the always in relationships with bad people. And it's like, I can't listen to your troubles anymore because this is your fault.
00:11:44:03 - 00:12:04:14
Unknown
Like, I really want to have empathy for white people. I do. I really do. I'm trying. I'm really trying. I'm trying to have more empathy for people. You know, I just don't know any that are going through anything difficult. All right. I don't know. I live in L.A. Most of most of the white people that I know creating their own problems, especially the white women creating their own.
00:12:04:16 - 00:12:28:16
Unknown
That's true. That's true. You're you're dating somebody who abuses you. Okay. That can bad. But like, you have come out of a relationship, like you're aware of it, like there's a consciousness about it. Well yeah he's verbally abusive to me and and I know it, but, you know, that Dick is good. Like, is stuff like that. And I'm like, Do you even hear yourself?
00:12:28:16 - 00:12:59:06
Unknown
Like, this is like, I shouldn't be telling you how problematic this is considering your past relationship history, but go off, girl. Yeah. I have so much space for somebody who's creating own problems. And maybe that was a bad example of being, you know, in an emotionally manipulative relationship. But like, it's things like that or like I, you know, yeah, just like creating their own problems and like, I just can't empathize with you.
00:12:59:06 - 00:13:19:18
Unknown
Whereas, you know, Kelsey in Omaha, Nebraska, who got dragged through the woods, you're like, She's really going through something. Yeah, man. Buried her life, you know? yeah, She didn't do anything. She was just getting directions at a gas station. Like, that's that's what happened to her. That is crazy. Like that white woman I can feel. You know, when I was.
00:13:19:18 - 00:13:47:07
Unknown
That's when I when I was in the military, that's when all of these white women tell me all these crazy stories. And they're like, And that was my Uncle Joe. And I was like, what? And they'd be like, Yeah, you know, you're you're touchy Uncle Joe. And I'm like, Fuck yeah. And then in every other. Yeah, from husbands everywhere, like had similar experiences of, like either being in the church or living in a terrible region where they're getting abused.
00:13:47:07 - 00:14:10:14
Unknown
And I'm just like, Whoa, What? Yeah, born into it. And I was like, okay, yeah, real, real problem. Yeah. Poor, poor white people in the middle Midwest and like on the other side of the country, they are exploited and then manipulated into thinking that we are the enemy. And then but that's also because they're just Yeah, they have those bad circumstances.
00:14:10:21 - 00:14:40:03
Unknown
That's the color of your fault if you're born into it. No. But if you join a little bit. A little bit. A little bit. You heard it first here. If you're 18 years old. If you're eight years old. Yeah. You legal? Just kidding. What was she wearing that? my God. Sometimes I forget. I forget that this isn't a private conversation.
00:14:40:05 - 00:15:05:24
Unknown
This is a recorded line. This is a record line. Yesterday, me and Danielle were together and she was helping me text back and forth with a person that I don't want to be texting with a woman, white woman. And she was like, Say this. Okay, now send this now send this now blocker. It was amazing. It was amazing.
00:15:05:24 - 00:15:37:17
Unknown
She's like an now blocker burned that fast in the air. And I'm like, yes, okay. She's going to unravel when she sees that green. Yeah. it was great. That was fun. Yeah. You know, one text two, text three block. Yeah. She was like, send the question emoji. Now the confused emoji now say not sure were you talking about and then blocker and I was like Mike drop moment all my problems are solved.
00:15:37:20 - 00:16:01:26
Unknown
Am I the manipulator? Jesus is going to be No, you're just like I said, you're an anthropologist. You have to interact with the environment in order to understand it. And yeah, this is yeah, this is what it is. The white arts. The white arts. Okay, wait, we have a topical. Yeah, we're going to talk about which you know a lot about.
00:16:01:26 - 00:16:26:14
Unknown
I don't know a lot about it. so Soho, Karen. Soho. Karen. I don't know if anybody remembers this, but Soho. Karen was the woman who snatched a phone or accused a 15 year old of stealing her phone and then accosted him. Try to attack and try to steal his phone because she thought it was her phone. And then, yeah, she was charged with a hate crime, as she should have been.
00:16:26:17 - 00:16:56:12
Unknown
Yeah. Two years later. Off the hook. Completely off the hook. Dismissed. It's now taken off of her record. So. So Karen is free. And also free. She is free like that, you three? Yeah, I'm just saying, I don't know. And I know I don't like. Also who marched for her? The Justice for Soho. Karen. It was also effective, but never effective for us is what if they chill for two years straight?
00:16:56:15 - 00:17:21:29
Unknown
Because those interviews. Okay, so yeah. Okay, you go now. Yeah. I was enthralled by this because this lady was so she was like Gen Z vapid. You know, that type of girl just like, you know, talk very defensive about the whole thing. She wasn't like, I'm sorry. I should have realized my, you know, implicit bias, none of that.
00:17:22:00 - 00:17:43:02
Unknown
She's very like doubling down. She's like, well, I thought that he had my phone, so I I'm sorry. I she goes on an interview with Gayle King the next day and she goes, I don't know. I'm 22 years old. Like, I don't know how this involves racism. I and meanwhile, she has a hat on that says Daddy on it.
00:17:43:04 - 00:18:00:26
Unknown
And I was like, this is not looking good. But it was like a car crash. I was like, put the volume up. And then she was sitting next to her lawyer who could be like, Just stop talking, stop talking. And she kept talking back to jail and being like, Gil's like, Hey, like, are you going to stay accountable?
00:18:00:27 - 00:18:23:10
Unknown
Your actions? Like, obviously you're being racist. You profiled this young boy. She's just like Gayle, Gayle, Gayle, zip it. She goes, Zip it to Gayle King through an interview. And then and then the lawyer is like, stop, please stop. And then the post interview lawyer is like, I. I tried to advise my client she would not take my advice.
00:18:23:10 - 00:18:46:23
Unknown
And and I was like, how is that girl now offer good behavior? She couldn't even sit through an interview. There's not nationwide television. this is wild. The audacity to then be like, Well, his father attacked me. It was like, Well, because you attacked his child, I would have attacked you, too. You would have been dead at the park.
00:18:46:26 - 00:19:15:15
Unknown
A little boy slapped my son. yeah, he slapped my son. And. how old was this little boy? Like the older the him 90. I will. And like, slapped him, but like, had his like nails out like went like this to, like, kind of like cloth slap at him. And his mom goes, my God, we've been working on that.
00:19:15:17 - 00:19:38:09
Unknown
I'm sorry. You've been working on that. Instantly I said, That is it. I'm sorry you've been working on it. She was like, Yeah. And I said, Square bitch. I took to fight this woman. I, I mean, like, I would have been that dad. I would have, I would have taken her down. And also that was a weird reaction.
00:19:38:11 - 00:20:04:14
Unknown
we've been working on this. Yeah. Which means you should have not let him get that close to any other children. Why would you let him get this close to another child in this end? Like we've been working on this like the way it's like you should say, like, no, take your pick up your baby. Say no, reprimand your baby, Apologize.
00:20:04:16 - 00:20:29:15
Unknown
Apologize. Yeah. Was like, Come here. Did it. She tried to come over and apologize later, like, can my son. and the hugging thing this full circle back to our first episode. yeah. So then she, like, comes back later. So we're at the playground and she comes back and she's just like, you know, I just want I talked to my son and I want him to apologize and I also want to apologize to you for how I behaved.
00:20:29:21 - 00:20:47:29
Unknown
I shouldn't have let my son, you know? But now, you know, it's been 30 minutes and she's gotten her sentence together because I told her to square the fuck up. Yeah, I was like, Actually, you should back up because I will slap you. Yeah. I mean, so she comes back and she's apologizing and she's like, Can my son apologize to your son?
00:20:48:01 - 00:21:06:13
Unknown
And I said, No, your son didn't want to apologize. Went after he did it. You talked him into it. And she was like, Well, can you give him a hug? And I said, No. I said, Get away from my son and me. Bye bye.
00:21:06:15 - 00:21:23:28
Unknown
Yeah. No. When? Also, how is that going to teach your son a lesson? Yeah. That he's been forgiven. I All right, All you have to do is go back and say you're sorry. Sorry? You're going to have to eat this one. I was like, This is not going to feel good for you. And let that set in and maybe that'll change your behavior.
00:21:24:05 - 00:21:49:01
Unknown
Maybe your son won't just attack children that he doesn't, you know, like well doesn't matter if you attack children. Yeah. Other children. I just like if that was my mom or like I immediately which is the wrong thing. Okay. It's the wrong thing. But what would they have done? They have picked me up, smacked me like if I was the one if I hit another kid, they would have been like, we're going home right now.
00:21:49:03 - 00:22:12:12
Unknown
I would have been like, I don't do that. Right? But no, we've been working on this. no, it's like potty training. I was like, What? This is a potty training? Yeah. He didn't accidentally just spit up food. It it was wet himself. He can hold it, you know, just having too much fun in the slide.
00:22:12:14 - 00:22:38:19
Unknown
I forgot to pee. He slapped my child? Yes. This is fucking wild. This is. This is what's so hard. We want to be a fun podcast, you guys. But you guys keep wilin out of there. You guys keep, you know, I just want the best for y'all, and I'm. I'm really rooting for you. And you guys keep making our headlines, our personal headlines.
00:22:38:21 - 00:23:01:02
Unknown
And, yeah, there was one more topical thing, but I don't even know if we want to talk about it. What is it? It was the J.Lo and Ben Affleck thing. right. I feel like we are not the experts because people are so deep in it, so deep in it. There have dissertations on it. You had to educate me.
00:23:01:02 - 00:23:24:06
Unknown
I was like, I didn't even know that. I feel like I it's yeah, I mean, I knew that they had been together before broken up, but like, he lives on the street anyways. All right. Next thing I was. But I will say Internet, keep doing your thing with J.Lo. He Ben Affleck because I am enjoying it. yeah her I think you internet moments like this.
00:23:24:06 - 00:23:50:21
Unknown
I really do appreciate the internet. Yeah there's little clips. Okay, let's talk about our immigration story. Da da da da da da da da da. Okay, so this. Well, then you has an actual immigration story. The the think what has prompted this premise is that what would have happened to us if we if I didn't grow up in America, If I grew up in Korea.
00:23:50:24 - 00:24:20:12
Unknown
And then you grew up in Kenya. But I was like, wait, you are actually do you have dual citizenship? Well, I have dual citizenship within the U.S. So you immigrated here, whereas I am Korean American born, born in America, and you. So, yeah. Tell us about how you immigrated here and do you regret it? Do you regret it?
00:24:20:15 - 00:24:45:12
Unknown
We, my mom left first. She left for Canada to do her master's. She honestly thought that she was going to pass us out like that and then go do her master's, come back and work. And that was her plan. Like, I have a couple kids, I'll go get my degree. I'll be working in a dance booth. And then she got there and she really missed us.
00:24:45:12 - 00:25:19:14
Unknown
Apparently she was like, Yeah, you're crazy. Yeah. my God, I left you. It was like, you didn't know before you left this. I love honestly, I want this for myself. So it really made that heart grow fonder. Yeah. And my brother actually would not speak to women he had after she left. He. like women leave.
00:25:19:16 - 00:25:42:25
Unknown
we as well. I so I mean there were. Okay, he this is going to sound so boujee he wouldn't speak to his nanny. So in Kenya everybody has household and we had my brother and I each had our own separate nannies and he wouldn't speak to her. Okay, like I'm done with you because, like, maybe you're going to leave, too.
00:25:42:25 - 00:26:02:17
Unknown
Yeah. Yeah, you're going to leave. And he would talk to my aunt and stuff like that, but her in particular. So she had that really hard time with him. And at the airport before my mother left, he was like so devastating, like gripped on dress and like, ripped it. it was a very traumatic event for her to receive.
00:26:02:17 - 00:26:32:09
Unknown
And obviously he doesn't remember it. But implied trauma, right? Like then my mom was like, my God, he's traumatized. And then wouldn't speak to his nanny, wouldn't listen to her, wouldn't eat, wouldn't like if she tried to feed him, wouldn't accept it. She tried to change him, wouldn't accept it like he was like, you don't exist. So after that, she you know, she's in Canada for a little bit and she's lonely and isolated.
00:26:32:09 - 00:26:54:09
Unknown
How many years, how many months had been we I don't know how long it was before they made the decision that they were going to move, but she'd only been there a year by the time we moved the following year. And how old were you guys when she left? I was almost I was like almost two. So I was like a little under one.
00:26:54:12 - 00:27:31:25
Unknown
And your brother's two? Your brother's like five is. No, he's three. Three. he's really one year. Okay. So he was a little bit older, so knew a little bit more. You're more resilient able to cope with it. I just at two you just knew I think and two I was just I mean apparently really funny stories about how I would talk to my mom on the phone and I would say that in in key combat or language, I would say you know, ashes of two, she's off in Canada with her silliness.
00:27:31:28 - 00:27:55:12
Unknown
there's like a saying, I'm going to like her silliness. Like, I'd be like, you know, and I'd be like, Come make me a cake. you're off in Canada with your sibling. And some like, it was like a weird I don't think I comprehended that she was gone. Gone? You know what I mean? I don't think there was that understanding yet within me, but with my brother, I think he really understood that she was gone.
00:27:55:14 - 00:28:21:12
Unknown
So then my parents decided that they would my dad decided that he would sell his business and sell the house and that we would move to Canada. And that's how it happened to me. I moved. We like my dad didn't have a work visa or anything, so it was all like under my mom's student visa. So it was very a very challenging time for my parents.
00:28:21:14 - 00:28:49:14
Unknown
My dad was criticized heavily, you know, just by the community because you don't follow a woman like, that's insane to abandon your business. You're a successful business and follow some woman getting her education first. All why is she getting an education? Boss? Boss lady right there, stupid. This is. This is like us. I live. I live for this shit.
00:28:49:14 - 00:29:15:13
Unknown
And I'm always like, Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, it is it. My dad was a very incredible man. Very. Just generous kind person who who's always just been like, She's equal and she wants to go do this thing. It's told me to support her if I can. And we're a family. He's always acted as a family unit, whereas my mom has been like, I mean, I, I kind of love about her too, with that one.
00:29:15:15 - 00:29:34:17
Unknown
Yeah. Because she, she literally just left him like two weeks ago back in Kenya. yeah. By herself weeks ago, like the other day. But she, I mean she goes routinely to do research or to take care of the farm like she's not like bad. She's independent, She has things to do. She's got things done. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:29:34:17 - 00:29:59:02
Unknown
And my and my dad respect. Then he will go visit her at some point. But yeah, they have a very, supportive relationship in that way. And my dad is very just like, whatever you need. And so men take notes and men take notes. You know, So we go to Canada and it was very hard for them. Supposedly I had no awareness.
00:29:59:02 - 00:30:18:19
Unknown
I think I was just kind of an idiot because I didn't know that we were poor, like we'd go to the food bank to get food, but it was kind of like this fun place where you get to like pick out stuff. It was free. You. And I was like ooh cereal. Ooh. Snacks. Yeah. It was very fun for me.
00:30:18:19 - 00:30:39:14
Unknown
And, and this is in Canada and Canada and then my parents, my mom decided to do her PhD, so we stayed longer. But even before that we actually almost got deported because my dad started working because we didn't have any money and a student visa. There's rules. There are rules, right? You can't work as a student. Even so, like, she couldn't.
00:30:39:14 - 00:31:02:19
Unknown
Even worse, she only got the money from her scholarship that was supposed to support us, like keep her entire family afloat. So my dad was working under the table, and this lady snitched. And so they we were literally going to be deported. I think it was like days like I think they had bought tickets already. That is so crazy.
00:31:02:19 - 00:31:32:18
Unknown
People who have to, like, snitch on immigrants who are working and other African Kenyan. Yes. A part of a culture. Coming out and then yeah, she had the best name to her name was New Mango. And I used to sing a song about, say, Deville. Deville. If she doesn't scare you, no evil thing. Well, yeah, that's amazing.
00:31:32:18 - 00:31:52:13
Unknown
That's an amazing song. And it also to the T. What the fuck? Yeah, Yeah. She will have to boot that out. But parents did not want to be a part of and so she decided that she was gonna snitch. it's always our own. It's always our own. Our. You know how many times my mom's like, you can't trust?
00:31:52:13 - 00:32:11:08
Unknown
No, Koreans don't trust a Korean trust anyone my mom does. You can't trust anyone. don't even trust yourself. My mom was describing. She used to swear I'm crying. She's like, you know, I was like, Mom. But, you know, because I was thinking about this thread about, like, what if I love Korea and she was just like, No Koreans.
00:32:11:10 - 00:32:28:08
Unknown
They do that thing, you know, where they they may sell you something that's not for real. And, you know, they ask you for all your bank information. Are you? We talk about scams. And she's like, yup, Koreans are known for scams and frauds and I was just like, okay. I was I can tell you, how does this tie in?
00:32:28:08 - 00:32:47:18
Unknown
And also like all of Korea, like, I don't know, it's very it's very silly. My mom's a silly woman. And also I think she doesn't feel comfortable going back to Korea. And every person who was like of that generation who visit goes back to Korea. They're so weirdly shameful about it. And they want to be like, I can't deal with these Koreans.
00:32:47:18 - 00:33:09:22
Unknown
And I'm like, It's because you left and you feel like this. You have to feel like you did the right thing. And I don't they don't want to like associate with the Koreans. She's like, yeah, the Koreans over here are crazy. I'm like, you just because you left and you're feeling salty about it. Yeah, I feel like I probably if if none of that happened, if our immigration story from my mom had just come back and we had suffered through those two years.
00:33:09:24 - 00:33:34:27
Unknown
Yeah I don't I don't know. My mom likes to fantasize about it, though. She likes to imagine that she never came to this country because it's been very disappointing, I think, in a lot of ways, like the American dream. Sure. Like they've achieved it. They have careers. You know, they're successful to it to a certain degree. But I think the the mental load of that success can weigh on you.
00:33:34:27 - 00:34:08:09
Unknown
And I think she's considered, you know, just how much easier her life would have been if she had been in Kenya. She would never face as much adversity or racism. You know, she would have had her family close by. yeah, I think for me, I've I've thought about it, too, just with how much I know about my culture and when I speak to my grandmother, who's 104 and there's only so many things I can talk to her about because I'm not fluent.
00:34:08:11 - 00:34:33:15
Unknown
So there are some times I'm like, man, I'd actually be able to talk to her. But then some of my cousins, they influenced me. This, way they live in Kenya. Yeah, right. So there's two languages. Everyone is educated in Swahili and English. When you go through the education system, however, most people there speak three languages because there's their ethnic group, they have their own language.
00:34:33:17 - 00:35:11:07
Unknown
And my grandmother only speaks cumber. Okay, she does speak Swahili, but not like an A, you know, and she actually knows more than me, but she she speaks combat and not a lot of like has actually speak it either. But I mean some of them do out and don't go for me either. Yeah but yeah it is kind of it is sad in those when I think about that also it's just been I don't know and also just want to say a weird annoying tidbit, but language endangerment is real and the loss of languages real with and how we have to keep it alive.
00:35:11:09 - 00:35:35:02
Unknown
Not having it. But I did take like, I didn't take a class on this, but there was a moment in that and then it reminded me of that. There's all these dialects and all these languages that all these generations have kept alive. And it's just it's really it's so part of the culture in a way where you're, you know, in so many of these languages, there's words that don't exist in an English word.
00:35:35:03 - 00:36:02:15
Unknown
There's no translation for it because it's so specific to that culture. And I think that's really beautiful. It's poetic. I don't know. Yes. Yeah. I mean, I think that's I, I think it's hard for people to understand. Like, yeah, we're so privileged to live in America. But like I always tell people that no matter what country I grew up, if I grew up in Korea, it's going to be my favorite and least favorite country.
00:36:02:21 - 00:36:22:11
Unknown
So America, I grew up here, so it's my favorite and my least favorite. I have every right to hate this country as much as I love this country. And if I lived in Korea, that would have been the same. So. So yeah. So it's like that part is kind of hard to think about, but it's also, I think you're an artist.
00:36:22:11 - 00:36:47:29
Unknown
You what? I Well, I was going to ask you, do you think you would have been an artist and done in entertainment if you stayed in Kenya? I honestly can't answer that. I don't know, because their their system is so structured. Like most kids go to boarding school. Like, that was the plan. My mom tried to make us go to boarding school in America.
00:36:48:02 - 00:37:26:03
Unknown
So like, yeah, you know, she was ready to let us go. I look, I'm going to step on her. She's paving the path that I want to walk. But, I mean, that's what she was used to, and it's a very. It's rigorous. Yeah. You get out, you, you know, you're like, you're educated, so I think I would have found creative paths within the schools because especially now, there's like, there's definitely, like a huge, like explorer or there's just a lot of arts being explored right now in Kenya.
00:37:26:03 - 00:37:51:09
Unknown
Like the comedy scene in Kenya is blowing up. Like, I really speak on behalf of it, but there is and there's just such a there's a subculture of artists right now that are really emerging from, you know, this gener this generation of parents that we had. I think that's pretty cool. Yeah, I think it's really cool and I could have been a part of that and that's, that's cool to think about.
00:37:51:09 - 00:38:19:00
Unknown
Like my, my cousin is an artist. He's a filmmaker. cool. Yeah, and an audio engineer and studied in Singapore for a while. Like, there's definitely, there. It's definitely in my family. Yeah. And I think that I was I don't know if it's not exactly this, but it is as we, you and I have talked about how like what our confidence be, what would our identity strength be?
00:38:19:01 - 00:38:42:04
Unknown
How would we if we lived and grew up in our home country, would we have like this? Would we have to deal with this layer of consciousness that we have to deal with now that like, prevents us from expressing ourselves in the fullest form? I don't know. I don't know. And I don't want to know because I think in a lot of ways, no way.
00:38:42:05 - 00:39:04:19
Unknown
Yeah, okay. I wouldn't have that double consciousness because I sort of I see my mom fighting it because it's like she came as an adult. It was a very different experience. When you're fully raised and you're aware, you're kind of like, wait, no, that's wrong. There's actually this really good book, but about a woman who's, I think she's like an angel comes to America.
00:39:04:20 - 00:39:30:05
Unknown
She's like, What the fuck is going on? And it's just like, so because they're she wasn't reared here and there isn't that dual consciousness sorry was dealing with. Yeah. No, I don't like. That, that makes me feel weird. That's inappropriate. I don't feel like I need to try to fit in. I don't need to, you know? But I see my mom fighting it.
00:39:30:05 - 00:39:59:02
Unknown
She's been here for a long time, so there's. There's a lot of. Well, I've been here. And how do I just. Or, you know. Yeah, the gap gets smaller. The longer you're here. The gap of, like, what do I. How do I assimilate at? Yeah, like that question of, like, you know, like, or maybe no, I think the you feel more inclined to assimilate the longer you're here.
00:39:59:02 - 00:40:22:24
Unknown
Like the gap of you being separate from that culture like you say, I'm American or I'm Kenyan living in America. I think that sort of closes the longer you're here and see that's why I think it's this was like an interesting thing I think because, you know, white people do all do this thing where they're like, just say that because you want to be different.
00:40:22:24 - 00:40:44:04
Unknown
And I was just like, quite the contrary. We actually have spent trying to figure out a way to be everybody else. And then as an artist are like, No, really figure out what's different about you. And I was like, No, I've been you know, you've been trying to condition that out of me. What are you talking about? Yeah, I've been trying to be the same as you for the whole love.
00:40:44:07 - 00:41:07:07
Unknown
Yeah, I meant the improv teacher. Now realize, like, you're. You're doing great, But then I feel like you're kind of, like, dwindling or your light is kind of like, dimming because of this and this. And I was like, Yeah, because I'm kind of, like, trying to support other people or trying to, like, you know, do the things and talking about like when I am in my very white improv class, this is how I speak.
00:41:07:10 - 00:41:24:23
Unknown
These are all my characters. Okay? That was like, well, hi Sally and see you there. And I'm like, Why do I act like? Why am I doing this? Like, why? I'm like, Why do I come into the character like this? Or I'll be like, my goodness, I'm so glad to see you. Okay, we're just in the kitchen.
00:41:24:25 - 00:41:46:20
Unknown
Every character, mine has turned into this person because everyone in that class does that. And so if even if it's a guy, I'll be like, Well, Daniel, I was thinking that we could go in the backyard tomorrow and do some lawn mowing. And and I've gotten to the point where, like, I don't even know what my voice sounds like, which everybody's like, it's just code switching, blah, blah, blah.
00:41:46:20 - 00:42:13:10
Unknown
But I'm like, also, I don't know, it's this thing where when some somebody, if you're in performance and somebody is like, what is happening to you? And I'm like, if I knew, like, you know, like I could fix it. But it's, it's a lot of stuff. And, and even when I take notes, I started doing what other like white actors or like improvisers do, and they'll be like, Right, right.
00:42:13:14 - 00:42:34:08
Unknown
Yes, I get that. And I was like, because I'm like studying them because they're also actors and theater, theater people, and I've never done any of those things. So I'm kind of like I what you mean? Yeah, I did feel that. Did you feel that? I did. I did feel that, you know, because I'm I subconsciously am so good at doing that thing.
00:42:34:11 - 00:42:55:23
Unknown
So, yeah, I don't know that that gap of like going back and forth, I think I just kind of go back and forth of like who I am, who do I be? We're going in a serious identity topic. So we told you we're going to talk about identity culture. So. Yeah, yeah, maybe we should spend a year in our respective countries.
00:42:55:24 - 00:43:21:24
Unknown
No, absolutely. I'll. I'll spend a night. They works. They most of them work seven days a week over there. No, thank you. I didn't say you had to get. How am I going to how I survive. Somebody will sponsor a sponsor. Go fund me. I would love to do that. Yeah. You know, like my partner into it. I would.
00:43:21:26 - 00:43:44:20
Unknown
I could do it. Let's go to. We should all go to Kenya. Be nice, live on the farm, see what that's like. I want Ivy to learn the language. I want to learn the language fully. You know, I. I think that also, as much as I'm like, it was so hard for me. Like, there are times where I was like, I do think I relied on the fact that I was different and why I would be like, let's go to Kenya.
00:43:44:20 - 00:44:06:07
Unknown
I'd rather to Kenya, because they would immediately see that I'm different and not have the same expectations of me. So but if I go into Korea, the expectation of me being this illiterate and incapable, they'd be like, What the fuck is wrong with that? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. you look like us. But you're not us the way you're acting here.
00:44:06:09 - 00:44:28:21
Unknown
Yeah, yeah. Something like, I guess this leads into our final thing, that there is something about, like, being other in your communities, like, I grew up with a lot of, you know, white people, especially, like, in my neighborhood, Like my neighbors were all white. I remember the first black family moved in and we. But you were the first black family or there was a it's okay.
00:44:28:21 - 00:45:11:08
Unknown
And then there was not enough to count when it when the first other black family moved in. My neighbor was so excited about it. We were we were in school together and she was like, my God, the families moved in and they're swimmers. And this this is also she tells me there's swimmers and there's the dashes just getting we're going to have to flip back and anyways, there so it says And on our way home, she asks her mom to stop by their house because they were usually like outside in the yard because they were like, and they were two black boys outside and her and my friend goes, are they so
00:45:11:08 - 00:45:39:06
Unknown
cute? And her mom goes, Yeah, for CNN. Like, there it is. But there was something about being other. I was always the fact that she felt comfortable to say that in the car. Sorry. Okay. But it was also funny because, like, I was never like black American to them. They never really considered me in that way. Yeah.
00:45:39:14 - 00:46:16:26
Unknown
Like, I guess you have that. You don't really have a comparison, but I'm. Well, I. I don't understand it. I'm not understand. Let me step back. But I know that there's a lot of like a the because I was back in the day when I was on clubhouse, we'd have these different rooms and there was like black American room and then like black English room like, like UK and the tension between like the UK room and then the American room there was a lot and people would hop back and forth and be like, no, you know, the diaspora in America compared to the diaspora in Europe.
00:46:16:26 - 00:46:43:19
Unknown
And like the things that we feel contentious towards is like completely different. So yeah, so how fun for us, how fun for you. Yeah, you're just like, okay, cool. Yeah, I never dated any of them, but it was nice for her to, you know, let me know that they were available for me. Wow. Wow. Yeah. Like who? Like in your community, it was just like, that's all I saw.
00:46:43:19 - 00:47:14:17
Unknown
It was a lot of white people. Fortunately. Generally. Right. And then. So did you date sad white people? No, not really, because it was the South. So there were like a couple people who tried to ask me out and like, kind of like a hung out. But it just like, it never quite felt right. And it was probably my fault in a lot of ways as well, just because I'm very disconnected to just like I don't ever realize that anybody has a crush on me until it's way too late.
00:47:14:17 - 00:47:48:01
Unknown
And then I'm like, And then I was just so focused on getting out of South Carolina that it wasn't really an option for me to, to, to date somebody there because I was like, my God, here. So from Canada to South Carolina, that's the big shift of your life. Or you're like, Welcome to racism or sort of, I mean, tangible racism, right?
00:47:48:01 - 00:48:14:01
Unknown
Yeah, like, read about it and knew about it and sort of like arrived in America with this delusion. I haven't been watching. I haven't. because I didn't see this. I'm just like, let's I'm so enthralled in your story. Okay, we got to cut it. Sorry, we have to cut it. We're going to talk about then you're in America and you and I mean, like bang, bang, bang.
00:48:14:03 - 00:48:42:00
Unknown
okay. Sorry, I didn't see the clock over there. Okay, that's it. Okay. we did talk about the Caucasian arts today. We did? Yeah. Flip flop. Yeah. White women, please just stick to one story of one philanthropy and, one advocacy. That is my tip for you. Just stick to it wholeheartedly. Don't try to compromise. Don't be like, but hold on.
00:48:42:03 - 00:49:02:18
Unknown
Don't be doing that. Also, if you want to figure out how to help people money, if you pay them what they're worth, yeah, that's it. I think a lot of people are like, well, I don't know what to do. And I'm like, Money. Yeah, just equity. Give it to people, the marginalized groups. Yeah. And then we creating immigration.
00:49:02:20 - 00:49:29:08
Unknown
So. Karen Okay, so Karen, you're out. Do right. Okay do right. Lady. we talked about immigrating. I would you would not. We know who the hero is here. It's me. It's true. I would not immigrate. You would not want to go back? Yeah, yeah, yeah. 100%. That is correct. she's my go back to South Korea is beautiful.
00:49:29:15 - 00:50:00:14
Unknown
It is. It's great. It's. It's not for me. Too many Koreans. Yeah. You know, it's not that. It's more or less that I don't want to be held to their standards. Okay? The American standard is great. Lower the bar. Lower it. And what else? I think that is it. It was so. I was so enthralled that I wanted to ask more questions, but then we only have ceremony time, So you guys tune in next time, this will be shortened.
00:50:00:17 - 00:50:04:06
Unknown
Hey, my my. Here,